Go go go

People often say to me that my life is really full of activity, that they rarely see me sitting still. I have generally always tried to quash this idea by just saying that they only see me when I'm doing something. However, today I have realised that I am in fact a bit of a mentalist when it comes to things going on.

I have been moved home for 20 nights now; I have only actually spent 10 of those sleeping at home. The other 10 have been spent camping, in London and in Manchester. Tomorrow I am going camping for the week at a Christian conference (New Wine) and when I get back I'm home for 3 nights before going camping again for another 5 nights. 

All this has led me to think...why do I relish in activity? Why do I find it hard to sit still? 

Well I guess firstly I should throw it out there that I'm a huge extrovert...I'm energised by people. I love spending time with friends old and new. So being by myself isn't my idea of fun. 

Also I quite like feeling like my life has purpose. There is nothing worse than being sat at home with nothing to do feeling like you are impacting noone and that your life has limited meaning. Me doing things generally keeps me from that feeling of being lost without direction. I love helping people.

Lastly, I think that I like activity because it makes me feel wanted. When you get involved with things people want you around. They see you as a friend and an asset and don't want to lose contact. 

Now out of those reasons only reason one is really a semi-justifiable reason for the level of stuff I get up to. The other two while they may be true aren't really the best motives for life full of adventure. 

As I've been writing I've been thinking of the story of Mary and Martha in the Bible (Luke 10:38-42) I am so so so like a Martha. Like I barely sit still ever to listen to what God has to say to me. The fact is that God gives my life complete purpose and meaning because he uses me in his plan to redeem all of creation to himself. Now THAT is something I want to be a part of. But I rarely give God time to speak into my life and to tell me what he wants me to do. The times when I do stop and give him time are so precious and powerful!! I don't know why it is that I don't give him more.

I'm thinking this is something I defo need to work on. 

I need to work on learning to stop working. Ha.

Down to business

Right so over the last few days I've been thinking about how too much of the time I see things in my life that I don't like/need to work on, but instead of actually doing anything about it when I see this I just think right I'll get on with it later. 


For example: You may remember that I was thinking about integrity a couple of weeks ago; well I have recognised this as something I need to work on. I want to be someone who sticks to their word, who people can actually rely on; someone who is transparent in all that they do. Now I saw that this was a need in my life but have I done anything to actually implement change...nope.


So today I have been thinking about the excuses I make for not getting on with things. Far too often busyness is blamed - eg. "I'm too busy to deal with that now" and then there is never a time when I'm not too busy. Also I can justify behaviour being like "Oh yes it's something I need to work on but it's not that bad". Basically just trying to make it into not a big enough problem to actually tackle. 


Well I've been trying to get practical because there is no point in just talking/thinking about things you want to change if you never actually get around to putting things into action. 
SO - in my bid to improve my integrity I am going to be:

• Only agreeing to things I know I have time to do well
• Not boasting about myself
• Not gossiping
• Not exaggerating
• Telling the absolute truth
• Trustworthy
• Sacrificial with my time/energy

7 points - one to work on each day this week. 

Anyone got any other excuses they use to get out of actually changing things?