Community

In the past if you have read this blog you will know that I talk a fair bit about community and the importance of it. It helps with feeling valued, like you belong and gives you an increased sense of identity and purpose. 

Well I have been trying to invest in the community I find myself in by:

1. Actively engaging with my (actual next-door, or on my road) neighbours - great banter from Maurice next door!
2. Joining a netball team to meet new people and widen my community - loving the girls, and the games.
3. Being committed to my Church mid-week community group - doing life with these guys every week. 

This week at my community group I was leading a part of it. Every week we eat together, pray, worship, share what God might be saying and take communion. Its a pretty relaxed affair and I always leave being pleased that I went.

Last Wednesday I decided to run a little exercise that I learnt from my friends over at XLP. We took part in the "Cup of Kindness".

For anyone getting worried it's not a weird occulty thing. Essentially, everyone gets a post-it and writes their name and something they would like prayer for on it. It goes into the cup and then everyone pulls a name out. Then we went around the room and when it was your turn you had to encourage/praise the person who you had pulled out of the cup and pray for them. The idea is then that everyone has an opportunity to jump in and encourage that person too and then for that one person you pray for them for the whole week. 

Now, before when I had done this it had always been in quite small groups of people who knew each other quite well - I wasn't exactly sure how this was going to go down as within our group (there's anything between 10-20 of us) there are people who I know really well and those who are still at the start of the friendship journey. But it was such a fruitful and uplifting time. 

Sometimes being honest about what you like about someone else not only does wonders for their self-esteem, but also for yours as you can see you are making an impact. Community only can go as far as the people within it will let it. Genuine community is about sharing life, the ups and downs, hopes and fears, weirdness and insecurities. That can only start when you really feel like people like you! 

I know that for me I have spent a large part of my life working or manipulating situations so that people like me. It's sometimes hard to believe that people will genuinely like me for me. The real, weird, over-the-line, energetic, possibly-too-much, me. I struggle with myself sometimes, even I find me annoying! But yet, in trying to be real, and the mess that comes with that, I have entered into real community. Where I can be honest about my fears and failures, where my uniqueness is celebrated and where I am encouraged to be myself. 

Last week I met up with a friend of mine who I have nick-named "Queen of Encouragement" because EVERY time we catch up I leave feeling like my spirit is soaring. Now not only did she buy me coffee and cake, but she encouraged the socks off of me. Being surrounded by people who can and WILL do that is a totally blessed place to be in. But it's where anyone wanting to grow in faith and living for Christ should be. If you want to grow you have to be in fertile soil; soil that is going to help and is full of nutrients. The people you associate with are either a blessing or a drain, there is limited middle ground. You need to make sure you have a good balance to spur you on. For me, I've been challenged; am I a blessing to those around me? Do I build them up? 

I'll stop with this verse:

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another" Hebrews 10:23-25

Encourage

I have had a brilliant week. It has been just what I needed. I took half term off as I felt like I was in good need of a break and it has been wonderful.

I spent the beginning of the week in London, just enjoying a slower pace of life. My family came to visit on Wednesday and we had a lovely day playing crazy golf, having lunch, shopping and just catching up. Loved it. 

I had another ace evening with my Church house group - opportunities to pray with each other, encourage each other and just do life together. 

On Thursday I went to visit these crazies in Cardiff.

I used to work with Jon, Bethan and Rhiannon when I was in Aberystwyth - we hadn't seen each other since April/May so it was great to have a catch up. Jon cooked AMAZING steak and we managed to break a number of his glasses...it was an eventful evening. 

On Friday I got a chance to meet up with Miriam, Josh, Rachel and baby Ivy - friends from Aberystwyth who I had last seen at Miriam's wedding in the summer. This was a joyful time of being able to encourage each other, hear about life in Wales and just be a part of my friends lives. 

Then on Saturday I was able to catch up with my friend Sarah in Norfolk - we visited the sea and walked along the coast to Cromer. It was a BEAUTIFUL day! 

As well as spending time with wonderful people I had ample travelling time with which to read. I spent some time reading through the book of Hebrews. There was one verse that particularly stood out to me. 

"But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today’, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness." Hebrews 3:13

I was really struck by how something as simple as encouraging someone else actually has the potential to stop them falling into something they'll later regret. As far as I can see encouraging others has 3 benefits:

1. That person feels cared about. In this increasingly isolated world people can feel like they don't matter, that no one notices them and that they don't have a place. Encouraging someone helps people to feel valued and that they belong.
2. You help to guard that person against sin. When people feel valued there is less of a need to turn to other things in life in an attempt to satisfy - drink, sex, drugs, work etc. 
3. You feel good. Mark Twain said "The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer someone else up". Encouraging others in turn helps us to feel like we have value. 

I was thinking, what would our communities look like if we did encourage each other daily! If every day you were being reminded of your value to those around you. I think it would make a massive difference. I'm challenging myself to encourage more.