Some of you who know me well may well know that the title of this post is one which has been a bit of a "Naomism" for the last few years - along with "I'm not going to lie" and "fair play".
I have always been someone who loves to have deep friendships - I like being real with people and getting that back. I think somewhere along the line since graduating I have stopped investing into those types of friendships. Whether its because the people who were that have moved away and its been hard to maintain, or whether its because I have been lazy and haven't wanted to invest into new people...I've stopped being real, being accountable, being deep.
My Church before Easter was doing a serious called "From rows to circles" where it was trying to encourage the Church as a whole to embrace being a community and building relationships outside a Sunday morning. There was a recurring phrase that has stuck in my head. "You can only be loved to the extent that you are known". So if people don't know you very well then they can't love you as much, or in the way that you need.
Moving to a new place I think changes you. Well it's changed me at least, whether I have chosen it or not I have become a bit more introspective and moving from that to going back to sharing is scary. What happens if I share too much, what happens if I scare people away with honesty?
In the last week I have probably shared more than I have in over 18 months.
It's been good. It was risky, but it was good.
Are you are sharer?
Do you like talking deeply or do you find it too intense?
In your experience is sharing good or bad?
I am a sharer. I think, though, people get the impression that I'm a lot more neurotic or emotionally unstable than I am because of it. I share things that may be quite small and insignificant, but people who aren't sharers will assume it must be massive to warrant someone sharing it. However, I love being a sharer and there are some friendships where I can be really honest and I always feel better for it.
ReplyDeleteI am a sharer to an extent, I get scared people will think I'm odd if I share too much.
ReplyDeleteIt is refreshing sharing though. I don't like being pushed into sharing by people. I would rather it be natural than intense so that I feel at ease.
The more I learn from Jesus though the more I let go of my fretting and I think I'm getting more open with people. Like you say, moving always stretches you in many ways. It's important to trust the people you share with so it's probably just taken you time to find the right people to talk to since you've moved. It's not a bad thing to be a bit guarded at first xx
Yes yes yes. I love to share. Although I often tend to share more of the miniscule/bizarre pieces of information and wait to be asked a question before sharing the deeper stuff, that's not a hard and fast rule though. I always want to have sharing relationships and can get quite frustrated with purely surface ones, so have tried to get into the habit of asking good quality questions.
ReplyDeleteBtw, a first hello in blogworld from Beefcakes! First of many I hope, miss you, you're well ace. Send me your address and I'll send you some real world correspondence :)